If I have to hear or see more whitesplaining from Fox News and basically every media outlet on how the Charleston Church TERRORIST attack had nothing to do with race, but attacks on religious freedom, a hate crime against Christianity, drugs, mental disorders or anything outside of the disgusting thing that it was, a hate-filled man spreading his racist evilness on innocents, I’m going to lose it.
Just because you act like racism isn’t real doesn’t mean it isn’t. Just because you want to act like the civil rights movement was so long ago WHEN IT WAS NOT, does not make your feelings valid. But you know what a valid feeling is? This anger I have boiling inside of me that I’m finding so hard to contain.
How the hell am I supposed to look at my nieces and nephews and guarantee them that they can live free and not in fear when I can’t make that promise for my damn self?! It’s a daily worry now that I could just look at someone the wrong way and be murdered because they felt threatened by me. It sickens me that there are areas of this country I become more afraid to visit because if there aren’t many people who look like me so I can blend in, I’ll stick out like a thumb. I honestly don’t even know what the hell I’m writing right now, I’m just so so tired.
What was the point of even giving Black people any kind of “freedoms” if you were just going to come back and try to take them away from us by taking away our lives? Dare I even waste my time making plans for the future when I could be snuffed out by an overzealous cop or murdered by some guy trying to act like his own personal lynch mob? CAN I LIVE? AM I NOT A HUMAN BEING TOO JUST BECAUSE I’M BLACK?? Just like white people don’t have control of what race they’re born into, neither can I! What makes these racists think they’re better than me just because they got lucky? You’re still ignorant and mentally stunted, but I’m not holding that against you! Too much…
Lke, I’m emotionally drained. I am. Although none of these tragedies have hit my family personally, I feel a loss with every young black life taken away. Every black life taken away. EVERY LIFE, BUT THAT’S NOT WHAT THIS IS ABOUT. IT’S MY OUTCRY FOR THE WORLD TO STOP KILLING MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS. STOP TREATING OUR DEATHS LIKE THEY’RE OUR FAULTS, LIKE BECAUSE WE DRANK BEER IN COLLEGE WE DESERVED TO DIE BRUTALLY. STOP JUSTIFYING OUR MURDERS IN THE MOST CALLOUS OF WAYS. STOP BLAMING BLATANTLY RACIST WHITE KILLERS TAKING OUT THEIR DEMONS ON POC AS MENTAL ISSUES. I’M NEARLY MENTALLY BROKEN BY YOUR ACTIONS BUT YOU DON’T SEE ME GOING AROUND AND KILLING YOU, DO YOU?
I’VE BEEN QUIET FOR TOO LONG BECAUSE MY GRIEF RIDES THE LINE OF ANGER SO CLOSELY THESE DAYS.
I said nothing about Mike Brown on here. Eric Garner. Tamir Rice. Ayanna Jones. Walter Scott. John Crawford. ETC ETC ETC ETC
But I literally cannot stay quiet for Clementa Pickney. Cynthia Hurd. Susie Jackson Ethel Lance. DePayne Middleton-Doctor. Tywanza Sanders. Daniel Simmons Sr. Sharonda Singleton. Myra Thompson. R.I.P.my brothers and sisters. I will not let your death be in vain. I will not. I will not. I can not. I refuse. I just can’t.
